


The End in the Beginning

by RunningInThePouringRain



Category: Bones (TV)
Genre: Booth realizing his feelings for Brennan, Dealing with the coma dream, F/M, Love, Sex, set after The End in the Beginning (4x26)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-18
Updated: 2020-09-18
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:06:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26525689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RunningInThePouringRain/pseuds/RunningInThePouringRain
Summary: He doesn’t own a nightclub.He isn’t married to Bones.He isn’t in love with her.Set after 4x26 (aka the Coma Dream). Booth deals with his feelings for Bones and remembering a fantasy life that didn't exist in the real world. No matter how much he might want it to be real.
Relationships: Seeley Booth & Temperance Brennan, Seeley Booth/Temperance Brennan
Comments: 6
Kudos: 71





	The End in the Beginning

He doesn’t own a nightclub.

He isn’t married to Bones.

He isn’t in love with her.

Booth had learnt to rebuild his life around those three sentences. He recited them in his head daily. Sweets even made him recite them aloud in their sessions together like he was hoping to find a hint of betrayal or anguish in Booth’s voice that he could attack until Booth spilled his guts for Sweet’s shrink analysis.

The kid was crazy if he thought he could outsmart Booth.

Booth understood it wasn’t real. Really he did. He knew he wasn’t married to Bones, he didn’t make love to her daily. He wasn’t allowed to hold her. He knew The Lab wasn’t a nightclub, it was just a lab. A lab with squints and murder and her.

They’ve all explained the science to him, the doctors, Sweets, Bones. The fact that his mind created a world whilst he was in a coma as a way to keep his neurons firing. Booth got it, he did. But if felt so real. As real as sitting in Sweet’s office did and while he wanted nothing more than to forget, he can’t seem to let go.

It’s torture really, remembering his coma dream. The way she looked at him, with love and devotion that made Booth’s heart constrict painfully at the image. The way she tugged him closer after a long night at The Lab when her feet were killing her, but she’ll never voice that weakness aloud. He knew though, he always knew. The way she looked when she shatters in his arms, her eyes getting impossibly blue. A shade Booth has committed to memory despite not knowing whether it was his imagination or reality. He wanted it either way, he wanted that intimate knowledge. He had it once, in a dream that wasn’t real and despite what he told Sweets he knew he wanted it back.

Sweets cleared him for work and Booth wondered whether it’s because he believed Booth is ready to go back or because he had come to conclusion it will be worse for Booth if he waited it out a few more weeks with nothing but his thoughts and his apartment that doesn’t have her in it. Booth didn’t much care either way, it’s a step forward, it’s progress and if he can’t have her then he wanted that. He wanted normal.

He can pretend just fine, pretend he doesn’t want her, doesn’t feel her presence every time they’re in the same room together. Pretend he doesn’t dream about her, about them, nearly every night. Because he did. He can’t stop himself, doesn’t want to stop himself. He wondered if that’s wrong. Bones would give him some anthropological reason for it, using words that would make him blush, but he doesn’t tell her.

He wanted her, he wanted them and if this is the only way he can have it then he’ll take what he can get.

_It’s early when he stepped into the shower, feeling the hot water rush over his tired body. He left her in their bed sleeping, she got back late last night after doing inventory but that still didn’t stop her from waking him up with cold fingers and her lips against his jaw. He smiled sleepily, already reaching for her as he rolled her underneath him with wandering hands. She needed the rest, he needed to be back at The Lab to meet Wendell to go over security for the new artist they had booked for the following week._

_Booth put his face under the spray, letting the water cascade down his body to wake him up. He heard the soft sound of the bathroom door opening and her robe hitting the floor before he felt the rush of cold air as she opened the shower door and slipped in with him._

_His breath caught in his throat as she placed a hand on his shoulder, his face turning to look at her, naked and bare and beautiful. They were reaching for each other with a practiced ease, his wet body pushing hers under the spray of the water and up against the tiled wall._

_“Bren.” He breathed, her lips already sucking at his neck. He could feel her smile against his shoulder as one hand slid down to his ass._

_“I don’t like waking up without you, Booth.” She told him softly, pressing their hips together in a way that left no argument that she was in charge this morning._

_Booth groaned as she ground against him gently, hands scratching down his back, “I wanted to let you sleep.”_

_His hands were skimming down her sides, lips moving over the curve of her shoulder, “Wake me up instead.”_

_It was an invitation, so was the leg she curved over his hip. Booth groaned again, drawing her in for a kiss that had his tongue thrusting into her mouth and his hands moving to grab her hips and lift her up into his arms, her back firmly against the tiles._

_“Booth.” She sighed happily when he released her for air, slipping one hand into his hair, “I want you.”_

_Booth rolled his hips against her, “You can have anything you want.” He vowed gruffly._

_“Just you.”_

_“Already yours.” He growled._

_She smiled wide then, “Show me.”_

_He pushed inside her without another thought, watching her head fall back against the tiles as he filled her, sighing as her thighs locked around him tighter. They moved together, slowly and lazily. Booth thrust into her tight heat with deliberate moves, making each slide deep and full so it took her breath away. He loved these mornings when they didn’t need to rush, when he could feel every second of this pleasure, of her._

_Bren was gasping into his ear, shifting her hips to match his movements to prolong the rolling pleasure. God, he loved her. He kissed her again, muffling a groan as she sucked his tongue into her mouth. His hips stammered then, harsher than before but no less powerful. Bren was shaking in his arms, a signal to her mounting pleasure and her need for him._

_“I love you.” She whispered in his ear, soft and sinful like she had just told him her greatest secret. Booth slammed into her again, he couldn’t stop himself. He wanted to do this forever, sink into her again and again until he couldn’t anymore._

_Her legs were quivering around his hips and he knew she was getting closer, he dropped a hand between their bodies, fingers seeking out her clit. She breathed out a harsh moan as he circled his fingers over her in the way he knew she loved._

_“Yes.” She breathed as he continued his movement against her clit, matching it to the rhythm of his hips, “Booth.”_

_Her nails were digging into his shoulders and he could feel his own pleasure tugging at him, his fingers worked her faster. She tensed around him, “Booth!” It was a cry this time, a call from the edge of pleasure._

_Booth growled, slamming into her again, “I love you.” He told her passionately, one more swipe of his fingers causing her to shudder out her release. Her walls gripping him into his own as he buried his face into her neck and rode out his pleasure with her surrounding him._

_“I love you.” He breathed again against her skin, his lips dropping a small kiss on her jumping pulse point._

He doesn’t own a nightclub.

He isn’t married to Bones.

He isn’t in love with her.

It was a weird thing, to mourn a life that never existed but some days Booth felt like that was what he was doing. The dreams would come at night, when he was at his weakest and wanted to let them in and during the day he’d go to work, work with her, eating with her and laugh with her and pretend he hadn’t woken up with her name on his lips, impossibly hard for her. Those were things he dealt with in private, normally along with large amounts of guilty for refusing to let her go in his dreams. She deserved love and respect, not to become his midnight fantasy. But he couldn’t have her in any other way. Not here.

She wasn’t his wife here; he couldn’t reach out to touch her like he itched to. He couldn’t kiss her in that way he knew she would like. She wasn’t his here, he didn’t have that right. He didn’t tell anyone about the depth of his struggles with her, not Sweets, not Cam. Especially not Bones. She’d run to the furthest country she could find. He wondered sometimes whether she could see his feeling for her written on his face and was choosing to ignore them because it was safer. How could she not see it, his love for her was like an open wound that was still bleeding.

It felt wrong, this world where they had murders and death and each other, even though it wasn’t in the way Booth knew they could be happy together. The wrongness of it all was threatening to swallow him whole. He took a step back, into her box of ‘partner’, a term that could mean so many things and blurred the lines enough for them to function together in a way that was as grey as the suit he wore because she always seemed to sneak more peeks at him in it than when he wore his black one.

He swallowed the lump in his throat that threatened to spit the words he wanted to say to her, asking about the victims and the case and the squints. Safer topics. He’d purposely say a word wrong so she’d correct him and lecture him and he’d push right back, falling into their bickering like a security blanket. This was as close as he could get to their fire, their passion without crowding into her personal space and crossing a line that existed in this world. Sometimes she’d laugh at him for his attempt to bicker with her and it would feel like a knife to his gut because he’d jolt to a place where he knew what that laugh felt like against his skin and he’d have to shift his legs to hide the evidence of his arousal from her watchful gaze.

_“Booth.” She called out as she strode into her office. He was already there, sitting in her chair pouring over their books as he always did at the end of the month. His eyes shot up to meet hers, her skin flush and her purple dress enticing him._

_“I thought you were staying on the floorl to keep an eye on Angela tonight?” He asked, surprised to see her while the club was booming beneath their feet._

_“She’s on a break. Hiding from your brother.” She replied, moving over to him._

_“I’ll talk to him again, tell him to back off.”_

_Bren slipped the paperwork from his hands, placing it onto the desk so she could have his full attention, “Angela wouldn’t want you meddling, she can take care of herself.”_

_“Jared needs to learn to take a hint.”_

_She distracted him then, straddling his lap with her knees on either side of his hips, her centre brushing over his crotch. Booth startled, hands gripping her hips with a frown, “Bren?”_

_“I need you.”_

_He groaned, her hips grinding down on him until he could feel himself growing harder. It has been like this since she had gotten pregnant. Her constant need for him, something he would never turn down, but Bren had a habit of needing him at the worst times. In meetings, The Lab, one time they had to rush home from the supermarket because she threatened to drag him into the toilets if he didn’t fuck her right then and there._

_She brought him back to her, rocking her hips against him with a frantic pace, her bottom lip stuck between her teeth. Clearly, she wanted relief and she wanted it quickly._

_“Jesus, Bren.” Booth gulped, hands tightening over his hips, “We can’t. Someone will come looking for you, we have a club full of people downstairs.”_

_She whimpered, pushing down on him harder trying to find the right angle. His hips were still, fighting everything inside him that told him to spread her out on the desk. They had glass windows in their office, there was too many people. They couldn’t. She shuffled back slightly, straddling his thigh rather than his crotch which seemed to give her a better angle for friction and Booth could only watch as she started grinding herself against his leg instead._

_“Please Booth,” She panted, rolling her hips against his thigh, hands gripping his shoulders over his shirt, “We can be quick, we don’t even need to take our clothes off.” She told him, rocking against his leg faster as she threw her head back. Booth gulped, watching her bring herself to orgasm by dry humping his thigh. He knew she would cum like this if he let her, without even having to touch her. That knowledge made him rock hard._

_“Fuck.” He uttered out as she gasped, pressing down on his thigh again, “Baby.”_

_“I need you,” She increased her pace, “I’m so wet, Booth.”_

_He could feel it through the material of his trousers, her desire for him. He’d have a wet spot from her on his leg once they were done._

_Booth’s hands moved of their own accord, bringing her back over his crotch, his erection bulging in his pants. He shuffled in the chair a little, getting the right angle to ground her against his cock through their layers, bringing his hips up to meet her._

_Bren moaned, “Fuck. Please.”_

_Booth’s voice was gruff, “I’ve got you, Baby.”_

_His hips started moving, rolling against hers in a frantic need to give her what she needed. He wanted to strip her, to be inside her but he wouldn’t risk someone coming to find them and seeing her like that. At least with their clothes on it was a little safer._

_Bren opened a few buttons of his shirt, just enough to slip her hands inside and feel his warm skin. Booth groaned, slamming his hips against hers as they ground against each other. He could feel the heat of her pulsating above him and leaned up to suck her bottom lip into his mouth._

_She lost her rhythm and was just going for desperate motions now, whimpers escaping her throat as she chased her relief._

_“Booth.” She breathed, “I can’t…”_

_She was so close, but she needed more, “Yes, you can. Cum for me, baby.”_

_“Booth.”_

_“You feel me, don’t you? Imagine how good I’m going to feel inside you when we get home tonight, Bren.” Booth panted, “You want me to fuck you?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“I want you so badly I won’t even make it to the bed before I’m inside you.” Booth told her, the pace of their hips unrelenting, “How do you want it, Bren? Up against the door? Kitchen table? Right there on the floor?”_

_“Booth.” She whined her blue eyes impossibly dark._

_“Fuck, you’re so goddamn beautiful.” He uttered, “Let go, Baby. Let me feel you.”_

_He was getting carried away, his own pleasure tugging at him as she came apart. He followed after her, his boxers becoming damp and sticky and he hoped he had a spare suit here because otherwise he’d be uncomfortable for the rest of the night._

_She shuddered violently, her whole body slumping against him in exhaustion. Booth caught her, wrapping his arms around her to guide her into a more comfortable position in his lap before placing a kiss on her forehead._

_She hummed contently, her released still pulsing inside her as Booth held her, “Thank you.” She told him softly._

_Booth chuckled, the laugh vibrating against his chest, “Anytime.” He replied cockily._

He doesn’t own a nightclub.

He isn’t married to Bones.

He isn’t in love with her.

He wore more waistcoats than he used to, a sign of another life when she couldn’t resist him in a waistcoat and her nimble fingers always managed to push it off his shoulders in the most seductive way possible. If she noticed the change in his attire, she doesn’t bring it up. It became one more unspoken thing between them.

He’s in his office, trying not to think about the way she felt in his lap. Trying not to think about her at all because she’s on a date. A date with someone who isn’t him. She told him earlier, dinner with a man from Egyptology and Booth had to force down the surge of jealously and anger because she wasn’t his. He didn’t have that right. He was petty enough not to tell her to have fun though, instead he reminded her to call him if she needed a ride home. She gave him that look, the one that said he was being overbearing but Booth couldn’t help it.

He was trying to distract himself with paperwork, not think about another man taking her home, learning things about her he only knew in his dreams. He forced down the unsettling feeling in his stomach. He didn’t think he’d survive her building a life with someone else. Opening up to someone like she had with him, Booth had fought for every inch and mile they had gone together and he was damn proud of that but there was still miles to go and he didn’t want to think about someone taking advantage of that just to get into her pants.

Maybe he needed more therapy with Sweets.

His phone buzzed and he reached for it instantly. It was from Bones.

**Meet me at Founding Fathers?**

His heart jolted, a million things in his mind. Founding Fathers, not the place she was meant to be having dinner with her date. Was she still with him? Had something happened?

Booth was making his way to the bar without a second thought.

She was beautiful, sitting at the bar with a glass of wine in her hand, a beer waiting for him in the seat next to her. She was alone, still in her red dress from her date, hair twisted up. She was breath-taking and she was waiting for him.

Booth slid into the seat next to her and she said nothing, pushing the beer she’d ordered for him into his hand, taking a sip of her wine.

“Are you okay?” He asked in confusion, eyes scanning her for injuries. He found none, thank God.

She shrugged, “I just wanted a drink with my partner.”

Booth was even more confused but made a show of bringing the beer bottle to his lips and taking a sip. She seemed to relax at that, shoulders loosening slightly.

“I needed this,” He gestured to the beer in his hand, “You know how much I hate paperwork.” He was keeping it light, not pushing her into talking until she was ready. Booth knew how she processed; she’d talk when she had ordered her thoughts. He’d wait her out like he always did.

“That’s because you let it build up until it becomes bigger than necessary.” She quipped, blue eyes meeting brown for the first time that night.

Booth shrugged, “The squinty stuff is your thing, Bones.”

“Paperwork isn’t ‘squinty stuff’, Booth. It’s just part of the job.” She replied.

He raised his mouth in a half smile, “Well, I couldn’t do it without you either way so that makes it squint stuff.”

They lapsed into silence, his whole body tensed, waiting for her to speak. When she did, it surprised him.

“I left Alec at the restaurant,” She told him, “I walked here.”

Booth took another sip of his beer, “Did something happen?”

“Do you think it’s weird that I wanted to have a baby with your sperm?” She blurted out in that way only she could.

He almost choked on his beer, “What?” They hadn’t discussed it since before his tumour, both careful not to bring it up until now.

“Alec thinks it’s weird.” She continued, “Thinks we’re too close.”

“And you think that too?” His heart was painfully tight.

She shook her head, “We’re partners. I’m meant to feel safe with you, and you with me. You taught me that in the field knowing your partner has your back makes all the difference to the effectiveness of the team. It’s only natural that I would seek out that level of trust for helping me conceive a child.”

He wasn’t sure how to process this, her admitting how close they were, bringing up the fact she wanted him to help her have a child, her feeling safe with him. His head was spinning so he pushed the beer away, turning in his seat to look at her.

“Bones, what happens between us, it’s ours.” He echoed those words back to her from a lifetime ago, “Alec doesn’t know us, he doesn’t get a say.”

Bones seemed to concede his point, “That’s why I left him at the restaurant. If it becomes to a choice between you and satisfising a biological urge, I’d pick you every time Booth.”

He swallowed hard, wanted to tell her she could have both. She could have him if she wanted him. All she had to do was say, “Bones…”

“I didn’t want to bring up my insemination after your coma dream. I didn’t want to confuse you further.” She seemed unsure for a moment but pushed forward, “Was it weird of me to ask?”

“I wouldn’t have agreed if it was.” He replied.

“Booth, I don’t think I want a baby like that.” She said softly, “Via artificial insemination, I mean. While it’s a practical solution, I do appreciate that it shouldn’t be my first option as I’m a healthy woman in the prime of her fertility who should have no immediate issues in conceiving a child.”

He was reeling trying to keep up with her, “You don’t need to decide on this right now, Bones. You said it yourself, you have time. It will figure itself out.”

“Everything happens eventually.”

He smiled then, wide and bright, “Exactly.”

“Can we get Thai? I left before they served our food and I’m quite famished.” She asked softly.

Booth looked at her then, this woman who had walked out on her date for implying she was too close to him, who chose him and reached out to him to comfort her and sort through her questions. It wasn’t the relationship he wanted with her but he treasured it with everything he had because it was a start.

“Anything you want, Bones. You can have anything you want.” He told her gently, already slapping money onto the counter for their drinks as he stood up to help her into her coat.

He dreamt of her that night, after leaving her apartment full of Thai food.

_They were in his bed, the room dark and intimate as they rolled around the sheets, bodies already naked from a previous round of love making when she got in from the bar. She was laughing as his fingers ghosted over the skin of her thigh, a sound Booth would happily drown in._

_She reached for him, fusing their lips together in a sinful kiss full of love and laughter and happiness. She was so warm underneath him, her soft skin pressing against his hard body as she ran her foot over his calf. The sheets were pooled at his waist, trapping them in their cocoon. He broke the kiss, making her follow him for another one. She laughed breathlessly when he moved back even more, letting her head fall back against the pillow. He loved teasing her. Not as much as she loved teasing him._

_Her fingers trailed down over his chest, skimming over his nipples and stomach as she headed for his cock. She quickly changed tactics, hands gripping his ass and pulling him against her as he let out a surprised chuckle. His lips placed a kiss to the skin behind her ear._

_“You’re playful tonight.” He commented, rolling his hips lazily against her as her hand got lost in his hair._

_She hummed happily, “You’re so warm.”_

_He chuckled again, covering her body fully with his own, letting his warmth seep into her, “I have to be. Someone likes to steal the covers.”_

_Bren smiled wickedly, “I get cold when I sleep naked.”_

_Booth groaned against her shoulder, “You don’t need covers when you have me.”_

_“Or when I actually wear pyjamas.” She responded, leaning up to kiss him softly._

_“Why would you want to do a thing like that?” He asked huskily, “You know I’ll only peel them off. Your pyjamas personally offend me.”_

_She laughed then, wrapping her legs around his waist, “How can they offend you, they’re just clothes Booth.”_

_“They only thing that should be wrapped around you in our bed is me, Bren.”_

_Their mouths met, tongues tasting each other. She rolled him over until she was straddling him, his hands fisting the sheet to keep it pulled over her hips so she didn’t get too cold. Bren flipped her hair over one shoulder, leaning down to flick her tongue over his nipple._

_“What about your shirt?” She asked against his skin, “I know you love me in your shirt.”_

_Booth groaned, large hands travelling up her spine, “I do love that.”_

_“Such an alpha male.”_

_He huffed, her hips rolling against his, “I don’t hear you complaining when I make love to you still you’re wearing nothing but my shirt.”_

_She hummed, teeth grazing over his earlobe in that way of hers that drove him crazy, “I could put it on now if you like? I think I throw it on the floor somewhere.”_

_She made to move off him and he quickly flipped them over, trapping her against the mattress with his body, “Don’t even think about leaving this bed.”_

_Bren laughed and he swallowed the sound with his lips, “Do you love me?” She asked softly, a challenge and a seduction._

_“You know I do.” He answered plainly, eyes like fire. “You want me to prove it to you?”_

_“Yes.”_

_He was slipping inside her before she finished the word, already hard for her. She was wet and ready, had been since they started teasing each other. He always marvelled at that, how much she wanted him._

_“So wet, Baby.” He whispered against her throat, buried deep inside her as her legs hitched around him tightly._

_“Make love to me, Booth.”_

_His breath caught in his throat, hips moving into a pace that was teasing and soft. The perfect type of love making for the early hours of the morning._

_“Yes.” He told her, lips finding hers in a jumble of thrusts and gasps._

_He thrust into her for what felt like hours, soft and slow. He was unhurried in his pace, building up a gentle pace that had both their pleasure building like rolling waves, nothing but the sound of their bodies and their moans sounding in the quiet of their room._

_She was getting impatient, hips trying to move his into a faster pace but he took charge. He wanted her to feel this, his body guiding hers to orgasm. His head ducked down to take her nipple into his mouth, tongue swirling around the bud. She would never admit how much she loved having him over her like this, his strength and agility on full display to her. His love for her a physical need. The soft glide of his hips, the deep thrust of his cock inside her. It was love making like that that allowed her to feel every caress of his lips, every tug of pleasure caused by him deep in her core. She wanted the release but she knew the wait would be worth it, waves of pleasure that seemed to last for hours._

_He could feel it even now, the rolling waves coming closer and closer together, one bleeding into another as his orgasm approached him. He had to stop kissing her, pulling his mouth away from hers to focus on her. Her hands had fallen beside her on the pillow, her eyes shut as the pleasure became an almost constant buzz of his hips against hers. His hands reached out blindly for hers and Bren opened her eyes to him, fingers tangling with his as she rolled her hips up to meet him._

_They came together, falling into their orgasms as the waves of pleasure rolled over them, intense and soft at the same time. It was coursing through their bodies as thrums of passion, a physical expression of their love. Their hands still tangled together as Bren tugged him down to her, his body heavy on hers as Booth held her tightly to him. He was still buried inside her and she seemed to want him to stay there for now because her legs were still around him, making space for him with her body._

_“I love you so much, Booth.” She whispered into his ear with a smile._

_Booth kissed her salty skin and let out a shuddering breath, “No clothes, ever.”_

_That made her chuckle, the laugh vibrating through her body right into his._

He doesn’t own a nightclub.

He isn’t married to Bones.

He isn’t in love with her.

It was getting harder and harder to repeat those words to himself, especially at times like this when she seemed so close he could almost remember the feel of being inside her. He looked at his clock. 4:47am. It always was when he woke up from dreams of her. His mind remembering another life when she’d climb into bed after a shift at The Lab. His hands were reaching for her before he remembered it wasn’t real, none of it. His fingers encountering smooth sheets and empty air.

She wasn’t here. Of course, she wasn’t here.

He got dressed, went for a run, got on with his day. He was good at that now. She was still like fire in his blood, electricity in his veins. He ached for her in a way that almost scared him and a way that would definitely scare her if she knew. It was like a flood being held back by a dam but the dam was breaking and Booth couldn’t stop it.

She wasn’t his wife. She wasn’t carrying his child.

Not here.

But he wanted her. He wanted that future for them. They were headed for disaster and Booth knew it was going to be his fault. He was too weak to hold it back, to hold her back. He was drowning in the weight of it all.

He found more reasons to go to the lab now, but he couldn’t stop his mind from transforming it into The Lab. He’d see Wendell with a toothpick in his mouth or Sweets mixing cocktails off to the side. He’d see blues and purples and her office and her. It was comforting and jarring, and it made him dizzy just thinking about it.

He’d brought her dinner tonight, they sat on the couch in her office as they tucked into take-away containers in a well-practiced routine. He knew how to take care of her better than himself, food and space and patience. She was in charge; she needed that control and he’d willing give it to her just for more evenings like this one. Food and conversation and them.

“How are you feeling?” She asked, pushing the orange slices towards him.

A loaded question if he never heard one but he didn’t understand the context, “Great. I’m great. Everything’s great, Bones.”

She raised an eyebrow at him, “Any more confusion after your coma?”

Right. The murky waters of things they didn’t talk about, clearly she had decided they needed to talk about them. Booth wasn’t sure what to say, what she wanted him to say. Not the truth. Definitely not that.

“Don’t worry about me, Bones. My head’s screwed on straight, I promise.” He went for vague and hoped she’d drop it.

She didn’t, “It’s okay if you were struggling, Booth. I’ve been reading about coma patients and visions from a coma can seem more real than the reality they wake up to. It’s like a defence mechanism from your brain.”

“Why are you bringing this up now?” Booth asked, “We’ve avoided this topic for weeks, Bones. We don’t need to talk about it now.”

Bones bit her lip, “It was my fault.”

“What?”

“Your dream. I wrote it to keep my mind busy while I was waiting for you to wake up. It had been days, Booth and the doctors said you might be able to hear us so I should try talking to you. I felt silly trying to have a conversation with you when you couldn’t respond so…”

Booth understood, “You read the story to me instead.”

Brennan nodded, not willing to meet his gaze, “I just wanted you to wake up.”

He gripped her chin in his hand gently then, bringing her blue gaze to meet his eyes. She looked uncomfortable and confused but he refused to let her hide, “I did.”

“You did.”

“Why did you write it?” He asked softly, thumb stroking over her jaw.

She huffed, “I just explained.”

“No Bones, why did you write it? You could have read me anything, the latest chapter of your novel, the paper, anything. Why that story?” He asked.

She pulled away from his hand and he let her although his heart ached, “I don’t… I don’t know.”

Booth could see the fear in her eyes, she wasn’t ready. She hadn’t sorted through that answer for herself yet. He nodded softly, reaching for an orange wedge, “When you figure that out, I’ll be here.” He promised, biting into the sweet fruit.

“You’re not mad?” She asked.

Booth swallowed his mouthful, dropping the rind back into the empty carton, “Nope.”

“Why?”

He had to laugh at that, “Why?”

“I caused you confusion and distress. I took liberties in imagining a fantasy world whilst you were unconscious.” Bones pointed out.

“It kept me fighting, didn’t it? I woke up. The rest I can handle, Bones. Don’t worry about me, I’m not going anywhere.”

She sighed, a shift of tension uncoiling from her spine, “I think Alec was right, Booth. We probably are too close.”

He stiffened, “Okay?” It was a question, unsure where she was going with this.

“I’m not going anywhere either.” She shrugged like the news wasn’t making his heart soar.

He smiled, understanding what she was giving him. A small step towards something, an admittance to more. For now, it meant everything.

“Okay.” He smiled, stealing some of her noodles from the box in her hand.

“Booth!” She laughed, letting him get away with his crime.

_The Lab wasn’t opening for another few hours and everyone was getting ready for what would be a busy night. Booth slipped into the storage cupboard where they kept the overstock of alcohol from the bar, Bren was already in here counting bottles to make sure they had enough for tonight._

_“There you are. I haven’t seen you all day.” He greeted, closing and locking the door behind him._

_She spun round, eyebrow raised at the locked door, “You saw me this morning. We had breakfast at the diner.”_

_“This morning. That’s all day, Bren.”_

_“Booth.” It was a warning and a dare and he licked his lips as he crowded her against the back wall, sandwiched between the tall shelves of alcohol. She went willingly, hands already gripping his blue waistcoat, pulling him closer._

_Booth kissed her, licking his way into her mouth with an eagerness that surprised even him. He really had missed her today._

_“Booth,” She breathed as his lips wandered lower over her neck, “I need to meet Zack in my office to go over the set-up for tonight.”_

_Booth untucked her shirt from her form-fitting skirt and undid the buttons, revealing her breasts to him. His mouth descended on the swell of them in her lacy bra and he heard her breath hitch._

_“Kid’s going to have to wait.” He said against her skin, “I need 20 minutes.”_

_Her nails scratched his scalp and she laughed, “20 minutes?”_

_He groaned, “Okay, maybe an hour but I’ll make it good.”_

_“You always do.”_

_His lips travelled further down until he was on his knees in front of her, hands trailing up the outside of her skirt to push it up and over her waist. He needed to worship her, he couldn’t explain it but he needed her. His wife. The skirt was out of the way in moments, her lace underwear teasing him as the smell of her arousal hit him. Booth groaned, lips following the trail of his hands on the inside of her thigh._

_“Booth.” She moaned, shifting her feet further apart for him in her killer heels. Booth tasted her skin in reward, sucking the softness of her inner thigh until she was squeezing his shoulders and he was sure it would leave a mark._

_His nose brushed against her clit before letting his mouth close over her through her panties. The heat of his tongue causing her to gasp. He hummed his approval against her, making her squirm against him at the sensation._

_Bren was pushing her underwear down then, his fingers reaching to help slide it down her legs so she could step out of them. Then he was back on her like a drowning man, his mouth closing over her clit as he flicked his tongue out against the little bundle of nerves. Bren moaned, hips rolling against him as he tasted her. He loved her taste and he knew she loved to see him with his head between her thighs, bringing her pleasure with his mouth on her. He ignored the pain in his knees as he sucked her into his mouth, urging her leg up and over his shoulder so he could gain better access._

_Bren was always a loud lover, something that turned him on like crazy and he could feel himself hard and desperate for her as he sucked her off, her moans and his name spilling from her lips like her own form of prayer._

_Her heel was digging into his back but he didn’t care when he flicked his tongue against her again and her whole body seemed to jolt. Her hands were in his hand, at his shoulder, touching anywhere she could reach._

_“Fuck, Booth.” She panted out and he could only growl, deep and primal in his chest and he moved a hand down, pushing two fingers into her core as he devoured her with his tongue. Bren shook as he moved his free hand to the curve of her ass to steady her, her own hands were gripping the shelves either side of her to get her upright as Booth fucked her with his tongue and his fingers._

_She came suddenly, a sharp cry and an onslaught of shakes as her whole body froze for a second before moving again, riding out the pleasure. Booth kept his tongue flat against her, letting her use him to ride the orgasm aftershocks to prolong her orgasm and when her leg fell off his shoulder Booth managed to pull his face away from her legs._

_Bren was pulling him to his feet, hands pulling at his tie until her lips were on his. Booth knew she’d be able to taste herself on his tongue. She was flushed and perfect and his. When she finally broke the kiss, it was to cup him through his pants._

_“Inside me now.” She told him, fingers already tugging at his belt._

_Booth couldn’t form a sentence as she pulled him from his trousers, giving him a quick stroke before turning in his arms, presenting the curve of her ass to him._

_“Jesus, Baby.” He swore, already lining up to slip into her from behind._

_“Now, Booth.”_

_He slid home, her heat warm and wet from her orgasm and he groaned at the feeling. Bren placed both her hands on the wall, pushing her body out towards him so he could slip even further into her. Booth buried his face into her shoulder as he started thrusting. It was a hard pace, he knew he wasn’t going to last long and he needed her to come with him again._

_She was right there with him, matching her hips to his rhythm as their pleasure built. He left hard kisses over her shirt covered shoulder with every thrust, moving down her spine as much as the position would allow. Tonight, when she was naked in their bed he would let his lips trace every inch of her spine but he didn’t have time for that right now._

_He thrust into her before sliding out and slamming back in again and again, feeling her walls flutter around his cock in excitement of what was uncurling in the pit of her stomach. Bren turned the tables on him when she pushed off the wall with her palms, colliding back into his chest. The angle was shallower but aligned his cock with her g-spot perfectly and Booth made sure to hit it on every thrust. Bren’s hand slid up to his neck, fingers curling into the short hair at the back of his head as she rotated her hips against his, rising up onto her toes every time he slammed home._

_“Fuck.” Booth grunted, stars already forming behind his eyelids, his arms were banded around her frame, keeping her to him. His fingers pushed the cup of her bra down, finding her nipple and rolling it as he slammed back into her. She cried out, it was loud enough that Booth was sure someone has probably heard it but he didn’t care._

_“Cum with me.” She whimpered, contracting her walls around him in a movement that took the breath down his lungs. She moved her head to the side, teeth grazing against his neck as he slid out of her again. As soon as he thrust back into her body she bit down hard. Booth stuttered, his orgasm taking him as he pushed them both against the wall so they didn’t hit the floor. She came only two thrusts later, shattering into his arms with his name breathed into his skin._

_Booth was sure his arms around her was the only think keeping her upright._

_“Uh, everything okay in there, Boss?” It was Wendell’s voice through the door._

_Booth groaned, “Yeah, all good Wendell. Stand down.”_

_She laughed in his arms, “You think that’s funny?”_

_“We both know you’re not going to be able to look him in the eye today.” Bren mused breathlessly._

_“We both know Angela is going to pounce on you the second we walk out of here.” He counted._

_She said nothing but shifted to place a kiss over the bite on his neck. That was probably going to bruise._

He doesn’t own a nightclub.

He isn’t married to Bones.

He is completely and hopeless in love with her.

Sweets told him he wasn’t. Cam agreed he was. Booth knew he was. The dreams wouldn’t be affecting him this much if there was nothing in there before the coma. Sweets had told him about his brain scans and Booth had given it time and space, waiting for the feelings to fade but they hadn’t. Every conversation he had with Bones just made him sure of his feelings. Every dream reminded him of how good they could be together.

He loved her.

The realisation was making him want to drown because he couldn’t have her. Maybe one day but not now. She wasn’t ready, she had made that clear in their conversation in her office. She wasn’t going anywhere but she wasn’t taking that step towards him either. He knew if he told her then he’d lose her and he couldn’t do that. He could wait, he could give her the control on this. He could live with dreams and hopes and one day. He could.

He had too.

She was too important to him. He’d kill for her. He’d die for her. The only difference was she wouldn’t understand now if wasn’t just because they were partners. It was because he loved her so completely he knew he’d die if anything happened to her.

One day he’d tell her that and she’d give him hell for being an alpha male.

One day.


End file.
